Feeling Lost
Have you ever felt "lost" in your life? That kind of "lost" when you don’t know where to go, what to do, or even where you are.
Currently I am somehow in the state of being "lost". There are many things that I don’t exactly know how to deal with, such as about the future or even about the relationship matters. Being "lost" is obviously not a right state to be in, and in my case, it significantly degenerate my efficiency in working and solving other things.
Few years ago, when I’m about to enter a university, the choices are not that many. I was choosing between continuing my study in Singapore or in Jakarta. Having predetermined about my interests, choosing a major to pursue was not a problem. The choice came out naturally based on some circumstances and I ended up continuing my study in Bina Nusantara International, without even giving a lot of thoughts on it.
But now, the conditions are different. There are more choices ahead and I have no idea which option is better than which. I have a year to decide, but that wouldn’t be easy for sure. When I finally decided about my future, I think I should be able to draw some rough roadmap about my future completely (for some of you who thinks I have such a roadmap written or drawn already: no, I don’t have it yet, but I certainly will make one). I know that I want to be successful in the future, and since it’s so important, naturally I am very motivated to be successful. The problem is that being motivated does not make the options clearer or easier, I still have to make that decision.
The case can actually be generalized to the case when you want to achieve something. Imagine you have a goal to achieve. Sometimes, you are very determined to reach that goal, but you simply don’t know how. That is not a pleasant situation to be in, because if you’re in there for too long, you’ll start blaming yourself on not doing the right thing to achieve your goal, or simply on not trying hard enough.
Well currently my only solution is keep trying and be patient, and also somehow believing that sometimes I can only wait for the solution to come naturally. However, I still believe that the awareness of being lost (such as me writing this post) is a part of the solution.
What do you think?
-Kurniady
Pertama2, define dulu goal (N) nya how big? Lalu algo yang dipakenya berapa complexity nya. Dari situ bisa keliatan runtimenya.
Kalo gw sih goal nya gak tinggi2, asal hidup berkecukupan dan bahagia aja hehe. Ini sekarang lagi precalculate di NUS. Jadi pas selesai hopefully lebih cepet majunya hehehe.
Kalo masalah bidang mau fokus ke bisnis ato compsci? Gw sih tahu kemampuan gw gak bakal bisa bisnis. Jadi no choice. Kalo elu tertarik ama bisnis dan yakin bisa sukses disana ya harus take necessary steps dari sekarang (entah apa), recalculate N nya lagi.
Di dunia compsci, setelah ngambil post-grad studies, banyak banget research problems ternyata. Gak takut kehabisan problems. Tapi untuk hidup ginian otaknya musti jalan terus, gak bisa santai. Tapi kalo hobi sih malah seneng dapet maenan
Kalo ternyata salah jalan yah gpp, toh sudah berusaha untuk jalan yang benar. Paling ngumpulin pendapat dulu di jalan yang mau dilalui ke orang yang sudah menempuhnya.
>>Sometimes, you are very determined to reach that goal, but you simply don’t know how. That is not a pleasant situation to be in, because if you’re in there for too long, you’ll start blaming yourself on not doing the right thing to achieve your goal, or simply on not trying hard enough.
Yup, g setuju banget ama kata2 itu. G sih sering ya ngalamin. But you can get the solution after some time. Either it come out naturally, or at last you look into yourself and you find out what you really want to do (things that you won’t regret later no matter what). Setidaknya g selalu memilih choice yang g pikir ga akan bikin g menyesal di masa depan nantinya. Eh, ato g yang memutuskan tidak akan menyesali action yang ud g ambil ya? Yah, yang manapun oklah, wakakak…
Santai ajalah, no problem kalo kadang2 feel lost. G aja pernah “lost” selama 6 bulan. Yang paling keliatan sosialisasi g jd kacau balau tuh! Bukan “less efficient” lg. Wakakakak….
oh, i thought you already have the “written roadmap”… :P. felt lost? pernahlah… gw pernah berasa lost sekali pas SMA, bahkan hanya untuk memutuskan mau masuk jurusan apa demi cita-cita dan hidup gw nanti, tapi gw tau keputusan gw ga salah :D. some people would think that IS major is “unclearly stated” major. hahaha. well, i don’t have explanation for that, but I do believe I’m going to the right way. semuanya berjalan sesuai rencana… semoga terus berjalan sesuai rencana.
good luck, and… “waiting for the solution to come naturally” is not a wrong thing to do. you must do a lot of pray sometimes
Thx for the comments
kalo salah algo, bisa jadi ada waktu ganti algo, bisa dioptimize, dll sampe AC, tapi kalo kelamaan bisa jadi out of contest time dan tetep nggak solved… hahaha…
@Felix : itu kayak lagi contest mon, jadi constraint nya udah dikasi di soal, trus kita memutuskan pasang algo apa
kayaknya gw akhir2 ini mulai bosen dengan comp sci, as a hobby masih ok, tapi kalo dijadiin kerjaan sampe bertahun2 bakalan bosen juga, makanya mikir dua kali mo masuk NUS ambil Ph.D…
@Sri : so far sih gw selalu mencoba memandang semua keputusan di masa lalu adalah sudah yang terbaik, jadi nggak ada penyesalan. Masalahnya adalah di masa depan mestinya kalo tidak mau menyesal, sekarang ini harus berusaha maksimal dan memilih jalan yang benar. Pilihan sekarang gimanapun optimalnya nanti kapan - kapan pasti ketemu juga cons nya… jadi ya balik lagi : yang udah lewat anggep aja udah pol..
@Fiona : will have that roadmap soon :P… the thing is that if you don’t struggle hard enough, the “solution that come naturally” will probably not the best one, and that’s my concern right now…
-Kurniady
weshh…topic yg berad huh hahaha…
well, klo buat future, jujur aja gw ndiri lom ada specific plan on what i’m goin to be later huakaka…tapi yg pasti, gw bakal achieve the best i can do for myself..
paling ngga yah sadar lah dengan limitation gw ndiri, since nobody’s perfect rite hehe…
just enjoy the life dude, ngapaen dipusingin, life’s hard already, makin dipikirin, makin pusink…so buat apa dipikirin…enjoy! hehehe
(ne POV dari orang yg lage males, tapi emank ini yg lagi gw pikirin buat comment blog lu kur hehe..)
enjoy d life
~pXanG
yahh.. sip deh kur.. i’ve face that early in the end of my high school life koq.. =).. Bingung mau kuliah mana.. trus urusan relationship segala macem juga ada kasih pertimbangan.. Bikin decision tree-nya :P. And I tried to create my own way for the next 8 years?! (wahahahaha).. Akhirnya yah buat 3 taon pertama ini sih running well yah.. But i don’t know the rest since everything changes.. And sometimes we can’t predict those changes.
For pXang advice sih gw super gak setuju yah.. Hidup tuh harus dipikirin.. Gak boleh gak dipikirin.. Ntar bengong donk kalo gak pernah dipikirin..
Yah sesuai kata Felix tu bener tu.. Sama kata2 lu jg uda cocok.. Life is a competition :)..
Good luck for your life dee.. ;).. Gw jg mau sedikit tweak2 plan idup gw koq biar 8 taon planning idup gw berjalan.. :)…
Yg paling penting sih gw bilang just do what u think u like most (and surely ada future-nya yah!). Kek misalnya suka bisnis ya uda jalan bisnis aja.. Bisnis jg rasa2nya bisa jalan koq meski gak perlu otak yg terlalu prima.. Uda terbukti dengan tetep “rajin” maen dota tiap hari ama dating jg masi bisa bagus koq :).. Kalo bosen comp. sci mah retired aja buruan.. Mumpung lu skarang ada di top of success :P. Kalo dah gak di top of success mah ntar dihujat2 doank
(peace ^^v)
wah…seru bgt topiknya…and at this time, i feeling like that…but, someone said to me 4 enjoy your life…jalani hidupmu…nikmati hidupmu…namun, bukan berarti tanpa roadmap yang jelas…tetap harus terencana…tapi, intinya cobalah hadapi yang sekarang ada di hadapanmu dgn sebaik-baiknya…every time…so, nanti tiada terasa sikap inilah yang akan mencerahkan masa depanmu….
Nb: “Einsten pernah bercerita bahwa dia sendiri tidak menyangka akan begitu (terkenal, dsb), karena saat itu dia hanya berpikir saya ingin terus meneliti…dan terus meneliti….tanpa berpikir ingin terkenal…”